It's actully been for the whole 5 weeks I haven't wrote! I wish I could say something like it's because I've got no end of uni work and everytime I start to write something comes up and distracts me. Resent news is I have decided my aim is now to move to Brighton in August. God willing, So I'm now sorting out my plans and everything, sorting out references, writting personal statements and will soon be sorting out my portfolio. It's exciting, I went to visit CCK on Sunday evening and it was soooo different to Solent and I was abit unsure about things but when I came home and prayed I realised it was because I didn't know anyone and moving isnt gona be easy anyway and God just wants me to step out. So I'm gona.
Something I'm strugling with at the moment is selectivly reflecting Jesus. Lack of consistantcy and I used to be like it. And I would be a liar if I said I reflected Jesus all the time. It's just now I have this feeling of when I fail at reflecting Jesus it gets me down, I don't do it deliberatly. But I feel like sometimes people chose to reflect Jesus when it suits them, When it doesn't effect the fun times they are having and then as soon as they want to recieve from God they are willing to go all out. Theres a wrong attitude towards sin, and thats that "You would like to but you shouldn't". For instance if you truely love someone you wouldnt want to cheat of them, Because you truely love them, you wouldnt say "Oh I love them so much but I wouldnt it be fun to be with someone else" and if we know sin seperates us from christ then why have this attitude towards sin?
I know I have been guilty of this, I want to change it. The best times in my life are spent with God, So I want to keep my eyes on him.
Something amazing about God. He is gracious... He sees our hearts. No matter how much we let him down, his grace is new each day, he will still use us. He is amazing. So amazing it will never be a question of "Who was good last week and didn't sin come here and I will use you" it's a case of "Who wants it? Here it is" That is whats so amazing about God, He takes you as you are. It is beautiful, It should get you excited, You should realise just how much he loves you, and take it in, let it change you, TRUELY shape you. and you will not regret it.
Someone said the other day that they had never met someone who had become a christian and regreted it, and its true. When I became a christian it was the hardest thing to do ever, and well it was horible, but I have never regreted it. It's amazing.
Friday, 20 November 2009
Wednesday, 28 October 2009
No Boys, No Booze.
I made a vow last night, No boys or booze for 5 weeks, Not that I am a massive slut who is drunk every night. But half my time is spent moaning about boys, or thinking about situations they and I have caused etc. And I'm not a massive drinker anymore since my 20th birthday. But I acidently got drunk on Friday at our house party and I dunno. I want all my concentration to be on God at the moment.
I made the vow (Whilst drinking a cider but that doesn't count) with my good friend Danny, Who isnt a christian. I'm really interested to see what happens. It's like, I know I can rely on God to fill that little gap or whatever. But what does someone who isnt a christian do? Uni work probely. But I shall keep everything posted on my blog.
I have the london photos now, I shall have to post them sometime. Next time, Right now I have a kitchen to clean. Well a little bit of.. cause alot of it is nowt to do with meee. I'm gona do washing up worship.. its my favourite.
Blessings in Christ
Deli
I made the vow (Whilst drinking a cider but that doesn't count) with my good friend Danny, Who isnt a christian. I'm really interested to see what happens. It's like, I know I can rely on God to fill that little gap or whatever. But what does someone who isnt a christian do? Uni work probely. But I shall keep everything posted on my blog.
I have the london photos now, I shall have to post them sometime. Next time, Right now I have a kitchen to clean. Well a little bit of.. cause alot of it is nowt to do with meee. I'm gona do washing up worship.. its my favourite.
Blessings in Christ
Deli
Tuesday, 20 October 2009
When people fail you... God will never..
Since I've moved to Portsmouth I've really been blessed, partically with the people I've meet, From my housemates, to my coursemates and then my church friends. Church partically has been a massive blessing. Over summer partically I noticed just how many people I have around me, And this is a fantastic thing. Over the past year though (please bear in mind these people have always been a blessing and I dont regret meeting any of them) I have just put too much of my happiness in them. The challenge in my life from now on is. If it was just me and God in exsistance would I still be happy? and I want the answer to be yes.
It's horible to think yourself as being mistrustful, But everyone is human but everyone can let people down, No matter how much you care about them. I know that I at some point even if its been a small thing have probely let everyone I love down at some point. I am aware I may be starting to sound bitter, By no means. We are all God's children and brothers and sisters and should love each other.
But can you imadgen having so much of God in your life, no matter who let you down you would feel okay, in fact still joyful. I am my own worse enermy and most of the grief I have in life is self made, and in this case when you get let down I find it so hard to cope and because I know God's love for me and how in control he is, I end up getting more worked up because I feel like I'm just not trusting.
My prayer tonight is Less of you, Less of me, More of God and it is such a strugle but I have no doubt that if I can do it (and I will) how amazing my life will be.
A few weeks ago I made a prayer in my prayer diary which went along the lines of "Lord, I have so many blessings, and everything good comes from you, and if you want take them, take anything you wish from my life, do as you will" and God did, since then I havent stoped wingeing, I suddenly got a feeling of being lost and not knowing where I was going or what I wasnt ment to do. This week I have realised the problem is I let God in, I asked him to do what he did, but then I didn't cling onto him. Like I jumped of a building whilst holding his hand, then paniced and let go of his hand when really all I needed was his hand. When God answered my prayer I kind of forgot the meaning behind my prayer.
It's now time to remember why I wanted this, and to put it into action. My heart everyday increases with the will to seek and reflect my Lord and savour. And I can't wait to see Jesus face to face.
I challenge any reader to make that jump with God, Give everything over to him, Every hurt, Every Feeling and Every blessing and let him do as he wills, let the only thing you hold onto be him, Be willing to give up everything. Keep hold of his hand the whole way. Then you will start to see how amazing and trust worthy your Father is. How he will be your light. How he is really all you need.
Philippians 3:8
What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ.
Thats all I have.. I always feel like I only make sence to myself and then I dont really make sence to myself anyway.. I pray I do.
on a lighter note.. I'm going to London tomorrow to take photos and stetches of medical stuffs.. exciting times.
Godbless
It's horible to think yourself as being mistrustful, But everyone is human but everyone can let people down, No matter how much you care about them. I know that I at some point even if its been a small thing have probely let everyone I love down at some point. I am aware I may be starting to sound bitter, By no means. We are all God's children and brothers and sisters and should love each other.
But can you imadgen having so much of God in your life, no matter who let you down you would feel okay, in fact still joyful. I am my own worse enermy and most of the grief I have in life is self made, and in this case when you get let down I find it so hard to cope and because I know God's love for me and how in control he is, I end up getting more worked up because I feel like I'm just not trusting.
My prayer tonight is Less of you, Less of me, More of God and it is such a strugle but I have no doubt that if I can do it (and I will) how amazing my life will be.
A few weeks ago I made a prayer in my prayer diary which went along the lines of "Lord, I have so many blessings, and everything good comes from you, and if you want take them, take anything you wish from my life, do as you will" and God did, since then I havent stoped wingeing, I suddenly got a feeling of being lost and not knowing where I was going or what I wasnt ment to do. This week I have realised the problem is I let God in, I asked him to do what he did, but then I didn't cling onto him. Like I jumped of a building whilst holding his hand, then paniced and let go of his hand when really all I needed was his hand. When God answered my prayer I kind of forgot the meaning behind my prayer.
It's now time to remember why I wanted this, and to put it into action. My heart everyday increases with the will to seek and reflect my Lord and savour. And I can't wait to see Jesus face to face.
I challenge any reader to make that jump with God, Give everything over to him, Every hurt, Every Feeling and Every blessing and let him do as he wills, let the only thing you hold onto be him, Be willing to give up everything. Keep hold of his hand the whole way. Then you will start to see how amazing and trust worthy your Father is. How he will be your light. How he is really all you need.
Philippians 3:8
What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ.
Thats all I have.. I always feel like I only make sence to myself and then I dont really make sence to myself anyway.. I pray I do.
on a lighter note.. I'm going to London tomorrow to take photos and stetches of medical stuffs.. exciting times.
Godbless
Sunday, 18 October 2009
A year later!
I am amazingly bad at blogs. But right now I feel really stired to keep a blog and to keep it going. I've decided I want to do more then write down for myself to then read later on, that I want to write down everything about how God is changing me, How he has radically turned my life around and how I love him more then anything ever. I was gona make a whole new blog but when I looked at this one with its whole one post I thought I might aswell just re-lanch this one.
The main goal of this blog is to tell of my experience of Jesus, of what I know is truth, and I welcome anyone who wishes to listen. However synical of faith you are, however much of a athiest you are, or whatever other faith you may have. My one prayer is that I will never give out a holyer then thou attitude, That people will always here my heart and never hear what I'm not saying. It will also be useful for friends and family from my past church to keep them updated on whats going on, cause all their prayers are greatly aprociated and needed.
I'm gona start with my testimony and a breif who I am..
My name is Deli, My full name is Adéle Francis Macro (although francis is not on my birth certficate) I am 20 years of age, I am very short and look about 14. I am an animation student at the University of Portsmouth. I live in Portsmouth.
I have a amazing family, every single person in my family has such amazing charector, I can't even fully describe any of them.. they just a amazing bunch of people. I have Mum and Dad and two Brothers (Carl and Adam, both older), Nannie and Poppa, Grandma (who passed a few years ago now) and Grandad, and no end of aunties, uncles and cousins.
My perents became christians when I was 7, No-one in our family (Apart from Grandma, who was a very strong catholic) were christians so this was a radical change for them, learning it all from the start sort of. I was baptised in the spirit when I was 7, at a place called sizewell. At my brother Carls baptism. Carl is one person in the world I have the most respect for, enough though he is my brother and I probely don't show it very well. Carl has suffered from liver problems since he was about 4ish (something obvs I'm not gona write loads about online but I feel is a big part of my familys testimony) he has had 2 liver transplants so far (he is 27). I remember at his baptism REALLLLY praying for him and really feeling the presence of God spirit in that place. Although I dont really remember all the details, I remember GOD WAS THERE.
I was a normal christian brought up child complete with all Sunday school answers (It's always Jesus or Peer Pressure for those who arnt sure) but as I got older I got less and less interested. I also didn't understand grace, so the more I got uninterested the more I did wrong the more I felt condemed, the more I moved away from God, The more I felt he wasn't there anymore. Untill it got to the point where I would say I was not a christian and I didn't have a belife in God. I was then in upper school and started dating a boy and all I will say on that matter was he wasn't good for me and probely helped in my walk away from God. My whole life started to only revolved around him. It got to the point where my family didn't really mean much to me ither. I became a totally self centered person and would do anything to please myself and never anyone else. I became really argumentative and short fused. I got into stuff that was starting to drag me down, majorly.
Through this time when I got year 11 a childhood friend (and lifelong sister in christ) invited me to a youth alpha course. I went, but only to catch up with her. So I was quite happy not to listen.. to give those sunday school answers I had learnt so well whenever asked questions and well I went because it was fun to be around people and mess about.
Then it got to the Holy Spirit away day, And the day was all fine untill it got to the "lets invite the Holy Spirit" bit.. and I saw two people become christians.. I saw there faces change and something hit me.. and It was like a big slap in the face. You know when your friend is being really anoying and you just want to slap them to bring them back down to earth? God did that with me.. But hit me with his love and I cried lots. and lots. and it was the just like that feeling at Carl's baptism. I felt so free, But sad at the same time. That I had let everything slip. But God was so graceful to me. This is the point where my faith became my very own. Where I became a follower of Christ.
Making this change was REALLLLLLY hard. Changing life style completely took well, It probely still isnt finished yet to be honest. There were major changes I had to make straight away. I feel out with the guy I was seeing cause he didn't like christianity, He didn't like that I wouldnt answer my phone during church.. and these times got quite intense and horible at times. But everything was worth it. I had never cried as much before I was a christian, Which is strange cause there was so much sadness yet its the best thing thats ever happened to me. But the point is it was God changing my life, I had to let it out to him, Be honest with him, Give it over to him, and say "Take it I trust you and I'm gona go your way" which is really painful to give over but when God has it.. my word it is worth it.
I went off to college, Studied Art and Design, Absoultly loved it. Then got my place at Pompey and moved here, My first year in Pompey was very shakey I found it hard being away from parents who woke me up for church on sunday mornings. My witness was pretty rubbish and I drank alot.. was drunk most the time probely. But then God got hold of me and sorted me out in that loving graceful father type way he does things. I got really involved with Solent Community Church, and this church has now really become my family away from home. I started on the tea and coffee rota, and now I'm assistant lead youth worker. I love it there and my time there has been such a growing experience for me.
So I think thats about all of my testimony.
Stuck in a box?
God gave me a word today.. and it really spoke to me so I thought I would just share it as a end note.
You know when you save up for ages to buy a child that one toy. They amazing one.. with flashing lights.. sounds whatever is cool for toys nowdays and you give them this gift.. that cost you a arm and a leg. But then all the child wants once youve given it them is the box, and they spend ages with the box.. and your like "What about this amazing toy?" "It cost me everything" and God says that to us. Leave the box.. I have a better gift for you.. one that cost me greatly and will bless you more.
I hope the way I've worded stuff makes sence.. I'm not known for my fantastic grammer and spelling and well.. talking. ha.
God bless you whoever may read :o)
The main goal of this blog is to tell of my experience of Jesus, of what I know is truth, and I welcome anyone who wishes to listen. However synical of faith you are, however much of a athiest you are, or whatever other faith you may have. My one prayer is that I will never give out a holyer then thou attitude, That people will always here my heart and never hear what I'm not saying. It will also be useful for friends and family from my past church to keep them updated on whats going on, cause all their prayers are greatly aprociated and needed.
I'm gona start with my testimony and a breif who I am..
My name is Deli, My full name is Adéle Francis Macro (although francis is not on my birth certficate) I am 20 years of age, I am very short and look about 14. I am an animation student at the University of Portsmouth. I live in Portsmouth.
I have a amazing family, every single person in my family has such amazing charector, I can't even fully describe any of them.. they just a amazing bunch of people. I have Mum and Dad and two Brothers (Carl and Adam, both older), Nannie and Poppa, Grandma (who passed a few years ago now) and Grandad, and no end of aunties, uncles and cousins.
My perents became christians when I was 7, No-one in our family (Apart from Grandma, who was a very strong catholic) were christians so this was a radical change for them, learning it all from the start sort of. I was baptised in the spirit when I was 7, at a place called sizewell. At my brother Carls baptism. Carl is one person in the world I have the most respect for, enough though he is my brother and I probely don't show it very well. Carl has suffered from liver problems since he was about 4ish (something obvs I'm not gona write loads about online but I feel is a big part of my familys testimony) he has had 2 liver transplants so far (he is 27). I remember at his baptism REALLLLY praying for him and really feeling the presence of God spirit in that place. Although I dont really remember all the details, I remember GOD WAS THERE.
I was a normal christian brought up child complete with all Sunday school answers (It's always Jesus or Peer Pressure for those who arnt sure) but as I got older I got less and less interested. I also didn't understand grace, so the more I got uninterested the more I did wrong the more I felt condemed, the more I moved away from God, The more I felt he wasn't there anymore. Untill it got to the point where I would say I was not a christian and I didn't have a belife in God. I was then in upper school and started dating a boy and all I will say on that matter was he wasn't good for me and probely helped in my walk away from God. My whole life started to only revolved around him. It got to the point where my family didn't really mean much to me ither. I became a totally self centered person and would do anything to please myself and never anyone else. I became really argumentative and short fused. I got into stuff that was starting to drag me down, majorly.
Through this time when I got year 11 a childhood friend (and lifelong sister in christ) invited me to a youth alpha course. I went, but only to catch up with her. So I was quite happy not to listen.. to give those sunday school answers I had learnt so well whenever asked questions and well I went because it was fun to be around people and mess about.
Then it got to the Holy Spirit away day, And the day was all fine untill it got to the "lets invite the Holy Spirit" bit.. and I saw two people become christians.. I saw there faces change and something hit me.. and It was like a big slap in the face. You know when your friend is being really anoying and you just want to slap them to bring them back down to earth? God did that with me.. But hit me with his love and I cried lots. and lots. and it was the just like that feeling at Carl's baptism. I felt so free, But sad at the same time. That I had let everything slip. But God was so graceful to me. This is the point where my faith became my very own. Where I became a follower of Christ.
Making this change was REALLLLLLY hard. Changing life style completely took well, It probely still isnt finished yet to be honest. There were major changes I had to make straight away. I feel out with the guy I was seeing cause he didn't like christianity, He didn't like that I wouldnt answer my phone during church.. and these times got quite intense and horible at times. But everything was worth it. I had never cried as much before I was a christian, Which is strange cause there was so much sadness yet its the best thing thats ever happened to me. But the point is it was God changing my life, I had to let it out to him, Be honest with him, Give it over to him, and say "Take it I trust you and I'm gona go your way" which is really painful to give over but when God has it.. my word it is worth it.
I went off to college, Studied Art and Design, Absoultly loved it. Then got my place at Pompey and moved here, My first year in Pompey was very shakey I found it hard being away from parents who woke me up for church on sunday mornings. My witness was pretty rubbish and I drank alot.. was drunk most the time probely. But then God got hold of me and sorted me out in that loving graceful father type way he does things. I got really involved with Solent Community Church, and this church has now really become my family away from home. I started on the tea and coffee rota, and now I'm assistant lead youth worker. I love it there and my time there has been such a growing experience for me.
So I think thats about all of my testimony.
Stuck in a box?
God gave me a word today.. and it really spoke to me so I thought I would just share it as a end note.
You know when you save up for ages to buy a child that one toy. They amazing one.. with flashing lights.. sounds whatever is cool for toys nowdays and you give them this gift.. that cost you a arm and a leg. But then all the child wants once youve given it them is the box, and they spend ages with the box.. and your like "What about this amazing toy?" "It cost me everything" and God says that to us. Leave the box.. I have a better gift for you.. one that cost me greatly and will bless you more.
I hope the way I've worded stuff makes sence.. I'm not known for my fantastic grammer and spelling and well.. talking. ha.
God bless you whoever may read :o)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
